I am the sort of person that emotionally invests in things (and people, just to clarify) far too much. It means that this weekend was exceptionally emotional for me, and I wasn't sure how to deal with that.
I think part of the problem is that I haven't been writing much recently and writing is one of the ways that I deal with my emotions. I think things through better when I am trying to writing and it can make me see when I am being ridiculous. (It happens and I know that).
Another part of the problem is that I haven't really given myself the time to sit still recently. I've been working a lot, learning to drive and also going to write ins each week. With all the time taken up with that plus life admin and laundry etc. It gets worse. I will have no time to really chill out before I actually start my new job. I think the next time I will actually have time will either be after my driving test is over and done with, or when I go back to Manchester over Christmas, which is slightly worrying though I am pretty glad that is only just over two months away.
The time I get on a Sunday to write or edit is extremely valuable, partly because it forces me to be sociable and also because it is pretty well protected from other things I do; I don't miss it unless there is a heck of a good reason to. I wasn't there today because I am ill and don't want to make anyone else ill. Also, there is nothing better for illness than a PJ day, so that is what I have done (though not properly as I have been trying to sort out banking things, which has been all of the fun!)
The idea is to be able to get everything I need to do to get out of the way over the next two weeks so that by the time I start the new job and NaNoWriMo, everything is as under control as it can be. At least if that is the case, then I have a fair shot at getting through NaNo alive.
Best get back to it. Catch you later.
16 Oct 2016
9 Oct 2016
Is It a Monster?,
There is this amazing song that was popular when I was at school by a band called The Automatic. Much of it is asking the identity of something traversing an incline in the topography, but it is wonderful. There were two ways I was thinking of going with this - I'll try and do both...
First thing
When we are approaching NaNo and whilst it is going on we can often feel like what is that? Is it a monster?
It can feel like it at times.
What you need to remember is that no one from NaNo HQ nor myself or anyone else is running around after you with a red hot poker trying to force you, we will not brand you with the word loser if you fail, we will not pick you up and shake you to see if the words fall out... We won't even shave your eye brows off if you fall asleep at a write in (because that is frowned upon). Nothing bad will happy if it is too much to ask at this moment.
NaNo is my motivation because I am competitive and it works for me. It working for me allows me to think of it as the chrysalis which forms around a caterpillar. The chrysalis allows the caterpillar to become something amazing, something beautiful. It allows the caterpillar to hold it together or to be held together.
To over exhaust this metaphor, the MLs provide the leaf or the branch on which this pod of transformation hangs, and the tree is the wider NaNo community. You need to be the change in yourself, but we're here to support you. This is the support network which allows use to become butterflies.
If slaying the NaNo beast works better as your metaphor, grab your light saber, throwing stars and flame throwers. Kill it with fire and a pair of phoenixes (you and your work) will rise from the ashes in a blaze of glory with Jovi blasting out in the background.
Second thing
Let's imagine that two WriMos are writing the same novel. Work with me here, it's going somewhere. The boy is sat with his diary on one side of his desk, laptop in the middle and something looking suspiciously like a Pokédex on the other side. The girl is sat with her laptop in the middle, wearing her underwear Superman style (red underwear over blue jeans). These visual representations give you an idea of which team each person is playing for.
Team Planner, what's that coming over the hill, is it a Monster? IS IT A MONSTER??
Team Player makes a grab for his Pokédex. "It is a monster, but fear not, my madeuposaurousatron with strength of whatever Top Trumps metaphor yada yada yada, well planned battle scene, win win injury save the day yada yada" Boom!
Team Pantser, what's that coming over the hill, is it a Monster? IS IT A MONSTER??
Team Pantser looks around herself and her eyes happen upon a plastic dinosaur that someone's kid sister decided to add makeup to. It has also had its body brutally melded to something that was possibly a Transformer made by that douche pants from Toy Story. Boosh: the madeuposauratron is born. Pantser thinks her way through a battle scene that is unfolding gradually in her imagination as her wrists cramp from trying to scribble down each drop of blood soaking into the ground beneath the battle field as her main character traverses this battle scene (and she knows he/she/it/they have to make it because otherwise it is Game Over for this novel. They slay and look as though they are winning, lose something like a finger or an eye, but win overall despite being viciously maimed...
The answer to the question of is it a monster is fundamentally the same, is, well, yeah, it is. The action the main character takes, again, fairly similar, but the difference is the person at the keyboard. Can you pants it? Can you plan it? What works for you? It's not monstrous, but that is a monster.
Run, and I'll catch you later.
Final Countdown,
I know it is not quite the final countdown for NaNoWriMo just yet, but I am acutely aware of that countdown because I am going to be starting a new job soon. Actually, on the 31st October. What was I thinking?!
Yes, so I will be leaving a job I have loved for the last three months ready to start something new and whilst I am really excited about it, I am also bloody terrified, because I don't necessarily deal well with change and it's a whole lot of change all at once. I am changing jobs, then at midnight it's my first NaNoWriMo as an ML. I have both of those things to deal with and I need to be writing a new novel, too. Understandably I'm a little bit nervous.
That is not to say in any way that I don't think I can do it - I know I can. I do well when I push myself. Pushing myself gets me to do more than I thought possible. I was hoping to make another attempt at a 15k day this year, but I think I am going to have to let that go. Particularly as I'm learning to drive also, and my instructor is anticipating I will be ready for a test in November. Once I am ready, I'm going to book in and just do it. I am sure I will probably fail once, but if I could get it out of the way before Christmas, that would be marvelous.
I expect that this year will be intense. I've had a few ideas of things I might want to write, and I've also, as usual, got a few things that I'm doing at the moment that I am not going to want to put down, but the problem with that is that I can't rush them. I have a feeling that they need time to happen organically and I would rather do that than force them and then ruin them.
See, this is an advantage of Team Planner. You can have done a lot of the thinking through everything so you know what you are writing and then it is a simple (no, not simple, but simpler) case of writing it down and progressing through your meticulous plans. The disadvantage of that for me is that if I plan too far ahead with writing, I get really, really bored. I like to essentially sit in the backseat and let my imagination take over and I can't really do that if I plan.
I'm going to have to stop writing this about now because my head has suddenly decided it wants to ache and this is possibly going to turn into a migraine. I'm sat in a Pret in Central London with my sun glasses on just trying to make sure it doesn't get any more agitated.
Catch you later.
Yes, so I will be leaving a job I have loved for the last three months ready to start something new and whilst I am really excited about it, I am also bloody terrified, because I don't necessarily deal well with change and it's a whole lot of change all at once. I am changing jobs, then at midnight it's my first NaNoWriMo as an ML. I have both of those things to deal with and I need to be writing a new novel, too. Understandably I'm a little bit nervous.
That is not to say in any way that I don't think I can do it - I know I can. I do well when I push myself. Pushing myself gets me to do more than I thought possible. I was hoping to make another attempt at a 15k day this year, but I think I am going to have to let that go. Particularly as I'm learning to drive also, and my instructor is anticipating I will be ready for a test in November. Once I am ready, I'm going to book in and just do it. I am sure I will probably fail once, but if I could get it out of the way before Christmas, that would be marvelous.
I expect that this year will be intense. I've had a few ideas of things I might want to write, and I've also, as usual, got a few things that I'm doing at the moment that I am not going to want to put down, but the problem with that is that I can't rush them. I have a feeling that they need time to happen organically and I would rather do that than force them and then ruin them.
See, this is an advantage of Team Planner. You can have done a lot of the thinking through everything so you know what you are writing and then it is a simple (no, not simple, but simpler) case of writing it down and progressing through your meticulous plans. The disadvantage of that for me is that if I plan too far ahead with writing, I get really, really bored. I like to essentially sit in the backseat and let my imagination take over and I can't really do that if I plan.
I'm going to have to stop writing this about now because my head has suddenly decided it wants to ache and this is possibly going to turn into a migraine. I'm sat in a Pret in Central London with my sun glasses on just trying to make sure it doesn't get any more agitated.
Catch you later.
2 Oct 2016
As Time Marches On,
Two posts in two days, what on Earth is happening?
Well, what's happening is that we're essentially in day two of advent for NaNoWriMo. I know that some of you have probably just gone, huh?, but it's a pretty simple idea.
Advent is, to capitalism anyway, a kick up the backside that you have 24 days until Christmas, so people go mad with shopping and wrapping presents and traveling to here there and everywhere in order to celebrate the joy that is Christmas. Difference being Christmas last 1-4 days for the majority of people, but NaNoWriMo is a month long slog of attempting to be effective at your passion.
"Advent for NaNo" commonly known as October is the time where previous NaNoWriMo participants, and to some extent newbies, decide which team they are going to bat for (giggidy). Well, we decide our home regions and decide if we are going to be #TeamPlanner or #TeamPantser. By the way I am #TeamPantser all the way...
Again, this is going to be one of those things which WriMo's look at and nod solemnly at (at which point, #squadgoals!) or sigh and shake their heads wondering how many of #TeamPantsers will get to the middle of November and not know what they are doing. Here's a hint: we never really know what we are doing; that's half of the fun!!
But since I know that there are people who read this who are not WriMo's (come to the dark side, we have cookies!!) I shall explain. #TeamPlanner is the group of novelists who write storyboards, or character profiles, or setting descriptions or just any and every kind of plan that you can think of. Contrary to popular belief, I have nothing against planning, or the novelists who do plan, but it is not something I do myself.
So Team Panters, what do we do? Well, again contrary to popular opinion, we do not run around our various cities, towns, villages, hamlets or fields pulling down people's pant, although that is a good idea come to think of it... Team Panters fly through November by the seat of our pants (hence the name) also cacking our pants and hoping that this novel is actually going somewhere...
Now just like when you chose your Pokémon Go team (Oh God, I'm opening a can of worms here, aren't I?) there is no right team to choose, though unlike in Pokémon Go, you can choose to change sides without having to press restart on the whole thing. It is completely possible to get half way through the month and then burn your plan you made in your under desk bin (provided you have the correct fire extinguisher nearby and parental supervision if you are liable to set your eyebrows on fire along with the plan). Maybe something less dramatic would be a better initiation to Team Pantser...
Equally, you can get half way through the month, be hit by some form of divine inspiration which means you see the ending and everything which has to unfold to get your characters and plot there (another hint: if you are going to walk towards the light, at least take some sunglasses because that thing is definitely not an energy saving bulb! Someone needs to have a word with God about his carbon footprint, never mind China and America) and then suddenly redecorate your studio with a blaze of Post It (or non-branded) sticky notes with phrases, events, squiggles and whatever which may make no sense after November (you know, when you have actually slept...) and work your way through writing each sentence until the scenes come together like seams and the result is something effective and beautiful. Or so you hope.
Be you Team Pantser or Team Planner, let me take this opportunity as the first of many to welcome you back to the sweet torture that is the lead up to NaNoWriMo, or to welcome you for the first time.
It is time to stock up on tea, coffee and human interactions because next month we settle down in the bunker of social awkwardness that comes from inane conversations not just wasting oxygen, but also wasting valuable writing time!! Let's bulk buy frozen pizza and make friends with the local Chinese delivery man - who on Earth will have time to cook? Sharpen you pencils, overstock on the same kind of pens, trim your nails excessively so that they don't do that annoying thing of getting trapped between laptop keys or breaking. Be nice to your mum so she brings you hot drinks and toast, even if most of the time they go cold because you didn't realise they were there what with your writing sprint being on. Review everything that you do to see when you can fit in more writing time. Be that obsessive. It is not the only way, but God does it make it easier? YES IT DOES!
While I commute into work, I will be writing on my phone. I used to download what I had written on my AlphaSmart while I was making a cup of tea to keep me going. That was last year. Last year I hit 15k in a day...
I would also like to say to all of you WriMos out there, I am here for you. I might only be an ML for London, you might have your own ML, but I will be writing Pep Talks that I put on here, so read them if you want to. We are hoping to do more online, so if you want to follow the NaNoLondon Twitter, please do. One thing I really hope comes across to everyone inside, outside and getting splinters in their ass from sitting on the fence is that we are a community.
We will be blasting off soon, so fasten your seat-belts. Catch you later.
Well, what's happening is that we're essentially in day two of advent for NaNoWriMo. I know that some of you have probably just gone, huh?, but it's a pretty simple idea.
Advent is, to capitalism anyway, a kick up the backside that you have 24 days until Christmas, so people go mad with shopping and wrapping presents and traveling to here there and everywhere in order to celebrate the joy that is Christmas. Difference being Christmas last 1-4 days for the majority of people, but NaNoWriMo is a month long slog of attempting to be effective at your passion.
"Advent for NaNo" commonly known as October is the time where previous NaNoWriMo participants, and to some extent newbies, decide which team they are going to bat for (giggidy). Well, we decide our home regions and decide if we are going to be #TeamPlanner or #TeamPantser. By the way I am #TeamPantser all the way...
Again, this is going to be one of those things which WriMo's look at and nod solemnly at (at which point, #squadgoals!) or sigh and shake their heads wondering how many of #TeamPantsers will get to the middle of November and not know what they are doing. Here's a hint: we never really know what we are doing; that's half of the fun!!
But since I know that there are people who read this who are not WriMo's (come to the dark side, we have cookies!!) I shall explain. #TeamPlanner is the group of novelists who write storyboards, or character profiles, or setting descriptions or just any and every kind of plan that you can think of. Contrary to popular belief, I have nothing against planning, or the novelists who do plan, but it is not something I do myself.
So Team Panters, what do we do? Well, again contrary to popular opinion, we do not run around our various cities, towns, villages, hamlets or fields pulling down people's pant, although that is a good idea come to think of it... Team Panters fly through November by the seat of our pants (hence the name) also cacking our pants and hoping that this novel is actually going somewhere...
Now just like when you chose your Pokémon Go team (Oh God, I'm opening a can of worms here, aren't I?) there is no right team to choose, though unlike in Pokémon Go, you can choose to change sides without having to press restart on the whole thing. It is completely possible to get half way through the month and then burn your plan you made in your under desk bin (provided you have the correct fire extinguisher nearby and parental supervision if you are liable to set your eyebrows on fire along with the plan). Maybe something less dramatic would be a better initiation to Team Pantser...
Equally, you can get half way through the month, be hit by some form of divine inspiration which means you see the ending and everything which has to unfold to get your characters and plot there (another hint: if you are going to walk towards the light, at least take some sunglasses because that thing is definitely not an energy saving bulb! Someone needs to have a word with God about his carbon footprint, never mind China and America) and then suddenly redecorate your studio with a blaze of Post It (or non-branded) sticky notes with phrases, events, squiggles and whatever which may make no sense after November (you know, when you have actually slept...) and work your way through writing each sentence until the scenes come together like seams and the result is something effective and beautiful. Or so you hope.
Be you Team Pantser or Team Planner, let me take this opportunity as the first of many to welcome you back to the sweet torture that is the lead up to NaNoWriMo, or to welcome you for the first time.
It is time to stock up on tea, coffee and human interactions because next month we settle down in the bunker of social awkwardness that comes from inane conversations not just wasting oxygen, but also wasting valuable writing time!! Let's bulk buy frozen pizza and make friends with the local Chinese delivery man - who on Earth will have time to cook? Sharpen you pencils, overstock on the same kind of pens, trim your nails excessively so that they don't do that annoying thing of getting trapped between laptop keys or breaking. Be nice to your mum so she brings you hot drinks and toast, even if most of the time they go cold because you didn't realise they were there what with your writing sprint being on. Review everything that you do to see when you can fit in more writing time. Be that obsessive. It is not the only way, but God does it make it easier? YES IT DOES!
While I commute into work, I will be writing on my phone. I used to download what I had written on my AlphaSmart while I was making a cup of tea to keep me going. That was last year. Last year I hit 15k in a day...
I would also like to say to all of you WriMos out there, I am here for you. I might only be an ML for London, you might have your own ML, but I will be writing Pep Talks that I put on here, so read them if you want to. We are hoping to do more online, so if you want to follow the NaNoLondon Twitter, please do. One thing I really hope comes across to everyone inside, outside and getting splinters in their ass from sitting on the fence is that we are a community.
We will be blasting off soon, so fasten your seat-belts. Catch you later.
Holier Than,
Back in Manchester I got one of my piercings done in a place called Holier Than Thou, which for a piercing place is either the best or worst pun in history. Personally I adore it.
I'm not really sure as to where my love of piercings came from, but it certainly went into overdrive earlier this year when I decided I was going to get two of them at once.
My nose has settled, quite happily, but my latest cartilage piercing is a different story.
Granted, I was a silly sausage and got it on the side that I apparently want to sleep on most often, but I was concerned that getting another on the same side that I have a helix piercing might look a little crowded since I only have quite small ears, though if I decide to get any more then this might have to be forgotten.
I tried explaining this to a friend, but "sleeping on it" doesn't sound like the sort of thing which does a lot of damage to you. It is one of the worst things you can actually do on a healing piercing because the pressure can damage the shape of the piercing... or something crappy like that which means you wake up with ear ache, a headache and general grumpy-arse tendencies.
When I first got it, as with when I first got my helix done, I went without wearing headphones for about three weeks because I know the pressure and the reasonably air-tight environment is just not great for piercings. Unfortunately I am far too grumpy and anti-social to be able to survive for much longer without needing to plug myself into my music and ignore everyone. Thankfully a conversation with one of the piercing people in the clinic where I got this one done has told me it is no longer infected and will hopefully heal fine if I just stop sleeping on it. It just might have a couple of bumps on it.
I started writing this blog post a few hours ago and have forgotten my point several times over between then and now... I'm also watching A Knight's Tale for the first time in years, and I still find my favourite line hilarious "It's called a lance - hellooo."
Ah, yes. So, the advice was, do not sleep on it.
Do not sleep on my right side. It sounds simple enough, doesn't it? Let me tell you, it is not so simple.
I am the sort of person who moves a lot in my sleep and so saying stay off an entire side is a bit difficult. I have to somehow drill it into my head not to sleep on my right so that even my unconscious mind holds onto it. I'm pretty sure that it means I don't sleep as deeply as I really should, but I know I need that my ear does need some serious healing time. Once it has settled itself in and healed I will be fine, it's just annoying that it might be quite a long time until that happens. It's supposed to be between ten and sixteen months of having it put in, but I'm sure that this will take longer now that it's been a bit messed up.
In a way, piercings are like novels. It is a slight pain getting through the first part, a little/lot more as you look after it, and then smooth sailing, for the most part, after that. The healing part, or the editing with a novel, can seem tedious and annoying and lots of other negative words, but I think that is the wrong attitude. The care and nurturing that you put into both processes shows a commitment to something and for my piercings, it's not just that they kind of look pretty, but that they become a part of me, like edits become a part of the novel. They become so integral that it is almost impossible to think of it without them.
I best go look after my little addition then - catch you later.
I'm not really sure as to where my love of piercings came from, but it certainly went into overdrive earlier this year when I decided I was going to get two of them at once.
My nose has settled, quite happily, but my latest cartilage piercing is a different story.
Granted, I was a silly sausage and got it on the side that I apparently want to sleep on most often, but I was concerned that getting another on the same side that I have a helix piercing might look a little crowded since I only have quite small ears, though if I decide to get any more then this might have to be forgotten.
I tried explaining this to a friend, but "sleeping on it" doesn't sound like the sort of thing which does a lot of damage to you. It is one of the worst things you can actually do on a healing piercing because the pressure can damage the shape of the piercing... or something crappy like that which means you wake up with ear ache, a headache and general grumpy-arse tendencies.
When I first got it, as with when I first got my helix done, I went without wearing headphones for about three weeks because I know the pressure and the reasonably air-tight environment is just not great for piercings. Unfortunately I am far too grumpy and anti-social to be able to survive for much longer without needing to plug myself into my music and ignore everyone. Thankfully a conversation with one of the piercing people in the clinic where I got this one done has told me it is no longer infected and will hopefully heal fine if I just stop sleeping on it. It just might have a couple of bumps on it.
I started writing this blog post a few hours ago and have forgotten my point several times over between then and now... I'm also watching A Knight's Tale for the first time in years, and I still find my favourite line hilarious "It's called a lance - hellooo."
Ah, yes. So, the advice was, do not sleep on it.
Do not sleep on my right side. It sounds simple enough, doesn't it? Let me tell you, it is not so simple.
I am the sort of person who moves a lot in my sleep and so saying stay off an entire side is a bit difficult. I have to somehow drill it into my head not to sleep on my right so that even my unconscious mind holds onto it. I'm pretty sure that it means I don't sleep as deeply as I really should, but I know I need that my ear does need some serious healing time. Once it has settled itself in and healed I will be fine, it's just annoying that it might be quite a long time until that happens. It's supposed to be between ten and sixteen months of having it put in, but I'm sure that this will take longer now that it's been a bit messed up.
In a way, piercings are like novels. It is a slight pain getting through the first part, a little/lot more as you look after it, and then smooth sailing, for the most part, after that. The healing part, or the editing with a novel, can seem tedious and annoying and lots of other negative words, but I think that is the wrong attitude. The care and nurturing that you put into both processes shows a commitment to something and for my piercings, it's not just that they kind of look pretty, but that they become a part of me, like edits become a part of the novel. They become so integral that it is almost impossible to think of it without them.
I best go look after my little addition then - catch you later.
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