...and unfortunately I'm not talking about a tall, masculine hottie who accepts the wild things which go on in my imagination. Perhaps one day.
Anyway, today my flatmate and I had a lengthy chat about the film The Woman in Black and which bits scare the living crap out of us. Since I was already scared of the dark, it was NOT a clever idea to watch such a creation, because ever since then I have been more on edge than ever. This is the reason I would probably struggle to live alone.
I'm going to define the terms of being scared of the dark. I'm not scared because there is a lack of light in the room - I'm scared because my spidey sense or whatever you want to call it likes to tell me something is there, or rather my imagination wills me to believe that something is.
My peripheral vision is not the best. In an exam where a boy was kicking his orange trainers under his desk, I would have sworn on the Bible that there was a ginger cat walking around, because my over active imagination likes to go cloud watching (or rather, blur watching - making shapes out of the flashes of colour I see) and it's really annoying, and can freak the day lights out of me.
For as long as I can remember, I've always had a night light on my landing, or I sleep with the backlight for my iPad or my laptop on. I very often have soft acoustic, classical or jazz music on too, just to keep me calm.
After dark, I really have a problem with windows, mirrors and our bathroom's skylight - plus any funny noises that sound like banging or footsteps. Horror films NEVER FLIPPING HELP!, but some of them aren't really horror films.
Anyway, after mutual admittance of still being nervous in our house after dark, I was putting away shoes in the hall closet, when I noticed our security light go on outside our front door - twice.
The first time, I calmed myself saying it was just the fox/badger/mole thing which got into our rubbish last night (we still need to sort out the garden, so it would make sense that it came back, since the split bag is still there) but when it came on the second time, that was scary.
Since we'd been watching a film, Eeyore and Teddy had been downstairs with us - there is nothing like being comfortable - so Stevie still had Teddy in her arms and the strawberry condom that we had just found at the bottom of our cleaning cupboard in the other hand. Slowly, she approached the door, making to open it.
"STEVIE! Leave the chain on!" If there was someone behind there, or even a fox or something, I didn't want it in our house! "Wait, wait, I'll get a stick." After checking behind the cupboard door - because I had gotten paranoid by now - I grabbed the solid hose of the end of the hoover and readied it for hitting the fox or whatever came through the door! BUT THERE WAS NOTHING THERE! The looks on our faces were pretty priceless though. To be fair, we're the sort of people who have to have the curtains in our living room closed after dark and I tend to sit with my back to the wall or I get a little edge-y.
Anyway, in all the panic, I've gone and left Eeyore and my blanket in the living room. A rescue mission would involve turning on all the lights in the house, but I'm not sure I can leave him down there alone...
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